Here you Darky, responding to your request for systems rather than tips, I've decided to re-visit my ill-fated Beer System.

Speaking of which, the disappearance of said Beer System was so strange, so mysterious, that I am thinking seriously about calling in Messr. Mulder and Mdm. Scully to investigate, as well perhaps as Hercule Poirot and his little b*tch Miss Marple.

So, given that it was the beer system, it should come as no surprise that I have no earthly idea what the rules were, and that system did end up on the scrapheap of the great untested systems anyhow, lying there thinking to itself, "Well, no results were ever produced about me, so it's possible that I'm brilliant."

With that in mind, here's it's little brother,

The BEER SYSTEM 2!

1. Horse must have raced within the last 29 days.
2. Horse must have won a race before.
3. Horse must not be a maiden.
4. Horse must be a horse.
5. What? No, no this is my beer, get your own.
6. Horse must not have a carrot up its bum when it leaves the mounting yard.
7. Jockey must not be Craig Newitt, or if jockey is Craig Newitt, horse must not be Leone Chiara.
8. Geez - did you see the t*ts on her? Hey? Who cares if they're fake!
9. That's right baby, I really did walk on the moon. Me and Buzz.
10. Hang on mate, I didn't know she was your girlfiend! Seriously - cut me a break, how could I have known, I'd taken one look at you and assumed you were a p o o f!


So, punters, there it is - The Beer System mark 2!!!

I bet it gets a heap of winners tomorrow.